Monday

Dear Diary ,

                  I am currently feeling nervous for this coming friday , it's a Big Day for all primary six pupils ---The release of PSLE results . My brother dreamt that i would get 243 and i dreamt that i would get 237 . i hope i can achieve my goal and dream marks -255 . It may seemed impossible now , i've made carelesses , written wrong answers for a few questions already , i hope that my math will get A* and my chinese , english and science will get A . I wanted to go to a mixed school , but my family wanted me to go to a girls' school . Giving up hope on RGS , they wanted me to enter Cedar Girls . Every little stress complied onto many 12 y/o students , our teachers',parents' and friends are all feeling the same . What can we do afterall? Pray . I'm not a religious type of person , however , my parents are buddhist so i followed . Sad to say but i do not believe in any religion , i will still pray though , for it's the only thing i could do for now . Knowing that i may fail my expectation , i will remind myself to bring tissue on that day -friday . My schedule on friday is to reach school with my family at 10.30 a.m. and they will release the results at 11.00 a.m. , and my life will be decided at 11.00 a.m on that day . I am fearful , what will the results be? Have my hard work paid off ? If i fail my parents expectations , what will become of me ? i certainly do not wish to look at the disappointed look from my parents and especially my teachers , Mr Isreal Teo and Mrs Sajir , who put in so much effort to teach me , to teach us , 6G3 , the class of A standard . My dad promised that he will give me phone by judging my results , if i get poor , i'll get an old phone , if i get 255 or above , i would get an i-phone gold :)  I am afraid of my future . I am afraid of failing myself , my parents , teachers and friends , i would love to score higher than my clever best friend , Belinda , for once , can i? Apparently she quarelled with a friend ( my another best friend ) let's call her "A". During the trip to kota tinggi , B ( belinda) was ignored by A when A kept talking to her friends instead of her good friend , B . B told me that she waited for A many times , but A would always be with her other friends , therefore B was upset . *NOTE: I DID NOT GO TO THE TRIP * so i asked A what she thought of it , and she said she rather be with many friends than be with B ,a single friend . So they ignored each other , leaving their good friends in a spot , great . * NOTE : A, B , ME AND N ARE BEST FRIENDS* yup , so they left N and i in a spot , both of them had no intention of stepping back , thus A went to her friends while B continues to hang out with N and i . N and i unknowingly became distant from A , so this is a message to A:

you are a really awesome friend and i did not mean to not hang out with you . I really want to talk to you more , however , nowadays , im always the one starting the conversation , i really want B and you to make up fast :)